The word sorry seems cheap and nearly meaningless in telling you how I actually feel, but I have to say it anyway because the word for what I did to you is so hard to admit. Abandoned. I abandoned you.
I've tried to justify it to myself for {amount of time}, but there's no excuse for the way that I just cut and ran. I wish that I had stayed in your life. I wish that I had tried to work through the anger and sadness we were both feeling. What I did was cowardly and damaging. I felt like I had chopped off my own arm, or hollowed out my chest, and I didn't know how to go on from there. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.
There's not much I can say or do to amend the years of sudden silence and distance and bitterness. I missed you more than I can say. I regretted my choice every second of the day. I can't take it back. I can only say I'm sorry—for hurting you, for leaving you, and for losing out on the joy of you.
{Name}
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